Disillusioned

When the castle of faith crumbles
And the bubble of belief collapses
Where does one go?
When loyalty cries of betrayal
And trust decays
Whom does one turn to?
When love becomes poison
And fire runs through the veins
What does one do?
Where lies the path
For the disillusioned?

A Transition from Optimistic to Pessimistic

The light shines down bright
Upon the path
For those who have one.
I have none.
They talk of hope, love, compassion
And of the good things in life;
They make me laugh.
I believed them, once
Saw the world with rosy eyes
Till they got burnt.
No hope for the damned like me
No silver lining, either
When the clouds are of fire
There are no Gods, nor salvation
For the likes of me.

A Transition from Pessimistic to Optimistic

I try to look through the clouds
Into the skies beyond
Where the sun is shining
In his majestic glory.
I can't. I've been avoiding
The sun for so long
That I now remember not
What he looked like.
I keep trying nevertheless.
I try, perhaps for the first time
to nurse my wounds
old, some dating back to eons
Festering, kept open by my own self;
Now they are hard to heal.
I try, nonetheless.
I had smiled, too often,
To hide my tears
Now I smile without tears.


The World doesn't change
Only my view has
I've looked through a smoked glass
A time too long
Now I intend to make it transparent.

Adieu

Standing on the seashore
Looking at the obscure stars.
The waves wash away
My footprints on the sand;
The sun inches towards dawn.
I look at the sea. Endless.
For me as well as those who succeed me.
Soon, the day will wipe out any trace
That this night ever existed.
Only the dew on the grass, and my memories
Its last remnants.

(This was my poem for the college yearbook)

Why should I cry for you?

You were my angel
who gave me hope, when I had none
Gave me strength, and courage;
You were my cocaine, my Holy Grail
The eternal fire on Mount Olympus.
You were there beside me
When I faced the wrath of Gods;
Kept me sane
When I shouldn't have been.
I lost myself, in the depth of your eyes
And in the euphoria that came over me
With your smile,
When I touched your hands
Kissed your lips.

You are my demon
Who never fails to haunt me
In my dreams;
Never fails to arouse a painful memory
When I get drunk at night;
Never fails to make my heart bleed,
Even today, when I come across your name.
You have made life hell for me.
But I bear no grudges.
You have taught me to be strong:
To live in agony, and yet, to live
The meaning of the words
Anger, Frustration, Depression and Hatred
And what it is, to live with them;
You have made me wise, and old.
So thank you,
And goodbye, my love- my hatred.

Not a Poet

I am not a poet
I just vent my frustration
Pain, sorrow, anger
On a piece of paper
When it becomes too hard to contain
Within.

I am not an atheist
I just find it hard
To listen to the words
Of a God
Whose words don't reach to me
In the first place.

I am not a rebel
I just find it pointless
To try to flow with the current;
To attempt to fit in, when I don't
And to pretend to be something I am not
Remotely.

A monk asked Joshu,
"I have just entered this monastery. I beg you, Master,
 please give me instructions."
Joshu asked,
"Have you eaten your rice gruel yet?"
The monk answered,
"Yes, I have."
Joshu said,
"Then wash your bowls."

Zen Buddhism

Venerable Gon'yo asked Joshu,
"How is it when a person does not have a single thing?"
Joshu said,
"Throw it away."
Gon'yo said,
"I say I don't have a single thing. What could I ever
 throw away?"
Joshu said,
"If so, carry it around with you."

Haiku

Have you ever seen a Mother
Smile through her pain?
A single drop of tear falls from her eyes
A pearl in the ocean.

Again, an old, untitled poem; but one of my favourites nonetheless.....

The sands keep on rolling
Dewdrops over the only leaf
Age, slow but formidable
Conquers all;

Leaves wither, fall to the ground
Young, promising chrysanthemums wilt
Even as old, unbecoming banyans carry on
Paradoxically.

The sky changes, from red to blue
Then to red again, then-
As the transition to black begins
The sun will have to go down.

Anticipation

Silent night
The magical moonlight
Looking into the mist
As I wait for you.
The wind rustles through the trees
I mistake the sound to be your footsteps.

Internship

(Written on 27/9/2007-that was the initial title)

Sitting in my office

I furiously type on, desperate for a distraction
The hammering in my head grows louder.
I gulp down a little cold water
Listen to some soft music
Try to relax my brain.
Nothing works.
The effects of having a peg too many
Threatens to puncture my mind
I cry to God for deliverance
Atone, for all sins ever committed in my life;
I run off to the restroom
And open the tap on my head
After a while, the prayers and the cold water
Seem to do the trick
The pain subsides
And as I walk back to my desk
My mind is filled with the reverie
of the dazzling night to come
and of the colourful goblets and flagons.

And the credit goes to.....

Harini!! Well, it was because of her pestering (rather constant pestering) that I decided to start publishing in my blog...she almost forced me to publish one of my poems that I showed to her(Office).
A little of it goes to Ipshita as well(Borkakati) for it was her and Harini's blogs that also gave me some inspiration to start posting! Without that bit of inspiration, I doubt that I would have started posting in spite of all of Harini's pestering("Lazy Pig"). I might have, but given the bum I am, in all probabilities I wouldn't have.

So, here's a toast to the two of you!!

P.S: Harini, where's my treat?

Massacred

This is a poem I wrote a long time ago and posted in my first blog ;)....I'm reposting it here....

The Sun peeks in through the mist
Not a wind stirs the leaves.
Or to disturb the souls of the dead.
The crowing of the raven
So happy, for its feast;
Dewdrops on the grass, red;
A single child lying on its mothers lap-
Both dead.

Office

This is a poem I wrote in my second month while I was busy working (or rather chilling out!) in my office during my PSII(internship, for the uninitiated). As always, open to your interpretations!!

The wind from the AC
Chills my bones.
I shiver a bit.
In the pin-drop silence
that prevails
I can only hear
The sound of typing
on the keyboards
and my own breath.
Sweatless brows deepen
As minds slog on
Frown on the face
And worry in the heart
The mechanical beast, the corporate
Marches towards its Goal.

Song of the Fortnight

The song of the fortnight is a song called "Your Guardian Angel" by The Red Jumpsuit Apparatus. It's from their 2006 album "Don't you fake it".

Lyrics:

When I see your smile
Tears run down my face I can't replace
And now that I'm strong I have figured out
How this world turns cold and it breaks through my soul
And I know I'll find deep inside me I can be the one

I will never let you fall
I'll stand up with you forever
I'll be there for you through it all
Even if saving you sends me to heaven

It's okay. It's okay. It's okay.
Seasons are changing
And waves are crashing
And stars are falling all for us
Days grow longer and nights grow shorter
I can show you I'll be the one

I will never let you fall (let you fall)
I'll stand up with you forever
I'll be there for you through it all (through it all)
Even if saving you sends me to heaven

Cuz you're my, you're my, my, my true love, my whole heart
Please don't throw that away
Cuz I'm here for you
Please don't walk away and
Please tell me you'll stay, stay

Use me as you will
Pull my strings just for a thrill
And I know I'll be okay
Though my skies are turning gray

I will never let you fall
I'll stand up with you forever
I'll be there for you through it all
Even if saving you sends me to heaven

Farewell

Sleep, my comrade

Upon mother earth’s lovingly tender bosom

Which you so rightfully deserve

And the sun and the moon

To keep you guard, as you sleep

For all eternity;

Sleep well, comrade; and Goodbye.